Daughter of a Queen Pin Read online

  “What’s up, Charday? Where you going?” Duane inquired, trying to be cool.

  “I’m just gonna get me something to eat.” I put that out there just in case he had enough nerve to try his game knowing there would be consequences.

  “Oh, word? I was just going to have lunch too. You wanna go with me?” Duane spoke in a strong, I-don’t-give-a-fuck voice.

  “Naw, that’s okay. I don’t want you to get in trouble with your boss.” I stopped, putting my hands on my hips. I gave him my stern look, waiting on him to give some excuse and back down.

  “Look, baby, I’m my own boss. I don’t answer to nobody. Malcolm got me started, but I got my own game and my own money. Now, do you wanna go eat, or are you scared?” Duane put the truck in gear.

  “No one owns me,” I shot back at him as I opened the passenger side and got in the car.

  This was the beginning of a long friendship and relationship with Duane. We started off by having lunch twice a week. He seemed to always come down the street when I was walking. We talked a lot and got to know each other. One day, he asked me to go out with him, dinner and a movie. I always thought he only wanted to see me during the day so we wouldn’t look like we were dating.

  “Why you never asked me before?” I challenged him.

  “All my work is done at night, and I didn’t trust my crew to do it without me,” he replied.

  “Oh, but now you do?”

  He looked me up and down. “Yeah, now I do. So, you wanna go or what?”

  There was no mention of Malcolm or my big belly that was now showing. I was well into my seventh month.

  “Uh, you do know I’m pregnant with Malcolm’s baby, right?” I finally asked.

  “I’ve always known. But hey, that’s Malcolm’s problem, not mine. I think he treated you wrong. I see you as a beautiful sister that I want in my corner. I will be in yours no matter what. That is, if you let me.”

  Duane had me stunned with that. I just thought he wanted to have sex with me. However, he never asked.

  “What do you think is going to happen if we get together and the baby is born? Do you think Malcolm will accept that,” I asked flatly, waiting for a response.

  “Let me tell you something, Charday. I’m a man that lives for now. I can’t predict the future, and I don’t try. I see what I want in life, and I do what I have to do to get it,” he proclaimed. “See, I really don’t care about what Malcolm accepts or don’t accept. I want you and whatever comes with you in my life. Now, do you want to be down with me or what? I’ll help you get off drugs and the whole nine.” Looking deep in my eyes, Duane demanded a truthful answer.

  I really liked Duane and enjoyed being with him. I would be looking forward to seeing him twice a week. “Yes, I wanna be down with you,” I answered in my most sincere voice.

  That day, my life changed.

  Duane picked me up around seven o’clock. The sun was just setting, and the cool breeze made the coming night mystical. The moon was full, and I had a tingle in my heart that I couldn’t explain. I hadn’t spent any time with a man in two months since I’d moved from Malcolm’s.

  We drove and talked as he got on the expressway. Duane was much smarter than I thought. Come to find out, he had his own business on the other side of town. He just needed someone he could trust who would watch his back. I knew he must have had a lot of trust in me. He knew I used drugs, but I vowed if he believed in me, I’d be down with him all the way.

  We came up on a tree-lined street. Duane had a weird smile on his face. He hadn’t said much in a few miles. I just assumed he had a lot on his mind. We soon pulled up to a beautiful house, and we both got out. When we made our way to the door, Duane pulled out a key and looked at me.

  “Are you down with me, Charday?” he quizzed.

  I looked deep in eyes and answered, “For life, if you want me to. I’ll be whatever you need me to be.”

  With that, he opened the door. We stepped inside a nice three-bedroom ranch-style home with a huge backyard.

  Duane looked at me and kissed me. “I want to put this house in your name, just in case something ever happens to me. This is yours forever.”

  I can’t believe this. I must be dreaming again.

  “Duane, I can’t afford this house.” I broke down and started crying, then I confessed about my current housing.

  Duane took me in his arms and held me tight and whispered in my ear. “I always knew where you stayed at. I knew you wouldn’t take any help from anybody, so I had to make my own plan to get you in my life.”

  I pulled back out of his arms. “You planned all this?” I was shocked.

  “Girl, I’ve loved you since elementary school. Whatever I’ve done in my life, I did for you. This house is paid for. If something should happen to me, it’s yours.”

  “Why do you keep saying that? Are you expecting something to happen to you?”

  Duane took my hand and looked in my eyes. “Charday, I’m in the game, the life. One day I may be here, and one day I might be gone. Can you understand where I’m coming from?”

  For the first time in my young life, I could actually imagine a possible future. “Yes, baby, you don’t ever have to look back, because I will always be there. You concentrate on moving forward. I got your back,” I promised before my dress magically dropped to the floor, my naked body exposed with my belly sticking out. It was a daring move for me. I gave him my most inviting look and most sensuous, sexy smile.

  Duane took a step backward, looking me up and down. “You are a beautiful, strong black woman. I will always be there for you.”

  We made love for the first time in our empty house, neither caring about Malcolm’s possible reaction.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  My life was forever changed. At least for the time being. I stopped sniffing dope cold turkey, which amazed us both. I guess I was so busy getting the house together for the baby, decorating and doing whatever Duane needed, that I didn’t have time for drugs. I was truly happy. The next month, I had my child, a beautiful baby girl. I named her Krystal. Duane was the man that I loved who’d help raise her. He meant the world to me and my baby.

  Duane had become one of the biggest dealers in the Bottom Barrel. He showed me how to make money and how to watch your money. Because he didn’t trust too many people, he had only one true friend, Renard Thomas. They called him Nardo for short. He and his girl, Rose, would visit a lot. Over time, Rose and I became good friends.

  The years seemed to fly by. I think it was because I was really happy. I didn’t want for anything in life. I had everything I wanted—or thought I wanted.

  * * *

  It was Krystal’s ninth birthday. We were having a party at the house for her and her little friends. Nardo and Rose had three daughters. With them and some kids from school, the house was full of children.

  Nardo and Duane were not there yet. They were supposed to have been at the house by three o’clock. It was now five, and I began to worry. I kept checking for them out the window while Krystal kept asking, “Where’s my daddy?”

  Those two had a tight bond. Duane’s love for Krystal was so pure, and he was the only dad she knew since Malcolm, her biological father, only saw her on her birthdays. His hurt over Duane and me being together was a deep wound.

  “Daddy is coming, baby. Go play with your friends,” I assured her.

  Rose who was helping with the party, asked me, “Are you okay?”

  “I don’t know, Rose. My chest is hurting, and my heart is beating fast. Duane is never late. He wouldn’t miss Krystal’s birthday party.”

  “Just relax, girl. Everything will be all right.” Rose tried to ease my mind.

  “Something is wrong. I love this man with all my heart, and it just doesn’t feel right. Please call your man to see if he has talked to Duane.”

  Rose called Nardo. When she got him on the phone, her eyes grew wide while she was talking. She tried to play it off as she left the room. When she returned
, Rose had tears in her eyes.

  Just then, the phone rang. I jumped to answer it with a nervous feeling in my stomach—a woman’s intuition. I keep my eye on Rose, and my tears started to flow before any words were spoken on the phone.

  “This is Detective Willis. Do you know a Duane White?” the voice on the phone said.

  “What’s wrong? No, no, it can’t be. He is supposed to be at home!” I stumbled over each word as my heart shattered.

  Screams and tears from Rose and I brought the kids running in.

  Krystal started crying. She must have had the same gut feeling I did. “What’s wrong, Ms. Lady? Where’s Daddy?” My soul was forever ruined as I listened to my daughter call me the pet nickname Duane had created.

  “Your daddy’s not coming home, baby.”

  Tears flowed like a faucet. Rose was crying, her three kids were crying, and Krystal and I were sobbing. That is all I remember. I must have passed out after that.

  I had a mental breakdown, and I was in a hospital for eight months. Rose and Nardo would visit every week, and after a while, I started to remember their faces. Rose took care of my daughter while I was there. She talked to me and revealed the truth of what happened only after I was released.

  Duane had gone to the store to get Krystal a cake for her birthday. Malcolm decided he was going to finally be a father to his child, and he had gone to get a cake as well. They started arguing in the store, and the tension carried out to the street. Malcolm pulled a gun and shot Duane, and then as Duane lay there in the street, Malcolm came near to finish him off with two to the head. Before Malcolm could shoot, Duane squeezed the trigger on the gun in his coat pocket. He got off five shots and he hit Malcolm in the heart. Malcolm fell on top of Duane. They were both pronounced dead at the scene.

  They said Duane had a smile on his face.

  How could I lose two of my child’s daddies at the same time on the same day? I would never be the same.

  Luckily, Duane was a very smart man, so he left me in a good position. Everything was in my name—the house, the cars, and our bank accounts. He even had an insurance policy. Krystal had a trust fund for fifty thousand dollars that would mature when she turned eighteen. I was not hurting for anything, except Duane. All the money I had and all the materialistic things couldn’t make me happy. I loved him so deeply. He was my whole world. I felt I couldn’t survive without him.

  I started on a downward slope. Soon after I was released, I started using drugs again.

  CHAPTER FIVE

  My life was in shambles. I slumbered through the years, using heroin, cocaine, and smoking weed. I used up most of my money and started to turn to men friends to help me pay my bills.

  Krystal was fourteen now, and we talked about everything in life. The only thing I had in this world was my daughter. I vowed to teach her everything about the streets so she wouldn’t get caught up. I told her about my addiction. I told her about what men wanted and what men would do to get it. I even showed her how to handle and shoot a gun. Since we were the only two people living in the house, we had to always protect each other.

  My drug habit was getting worse. I would go in the streets late at night and bring guys home with my daughter in the next room. I gambled with her life as well as mine.

  On Krystal’s fifteenth birthday, I wanted to get her something special. I couldn’t believe that I had gone through one hundred thousand dollars so fast. I was broke and desperate, so I picked up a large man at the neighborhood bar. He had a pocket full of money. I think he worked in the factory close by.

  I took him to my house, where we had sex. Afterward, he fell asleep. I reached in his pocket and took some of his money. He woke up just when I was putting his pants back.

  “Yo, what the fuck are you doing?” He started yelling and cussing, then he raised his huge arm and gave me a fierce backhand to my head, knocking me over the table.

  I got up to run, but he caught me by my hair, slamming me through the kitchen door. Blood ran down my nose as I thought about Krystal. I was glad I had made her go to school, although she wanted to stay home.

  Another blow from his fist brought me back to reality. He lifted me in the air, upside down and naked. Then, he threw me on the floor, jumped on top of me, and started swinging. He hit me in the face and in the head repeatedly. Then the sick fucker attempted to kiss me. His breath smelled like stale liquor.

  I tried to bite his lips off, so he hit me again. When he tasted the blood from his lip, it sent him over the edge. He was a big man, six foot three and weighing over two hundred fifty pounds. I felt like a rag doll in his arms as he flipped me over and then went to grab a broom that was nearby. I screamed, knowing his intentions, and tried to brace my body.

  Suddenly, I heard an explosion, and I blacked out. The next thing I knew, I felt someone gently touching my face.

  “Ms. Lady, Ms. Lady, it’s me! Please don’t leave me!”

  It was Krystal, holding my head in her lap. She must have thought I was dead. Her salty tears were dropping on my face.

  I got control of myself and lifted up to look around. The house was a mess. The large man was slumped on the kitchen floor with a pool of blood around him. I could see bullet holes in his head and chest.

  “What happened, Krystal?” I asked.

  “Ms. Lady, I’m sorry. I didn’t want him to hurt you.”

  “I’m not hurt. Krystal, you saved me. I am proud of you.”

  “He was beating you, Ms. Lady. He was gonna hit you with that broom. So, I shot him until he fell.”

  Krystal sounded panic-stricken. We hugged and cried and got our stories straight, then called the police. My daughter grew up on this day, her fifteenth birthday.

  * * *

  The next couple of years, I got worse, and Krystal grew stronger. She began to hang out in the streets, but she always came home and talked to me about what she was doing.

  One day, she came home and told me, “I wanna hustle. I wanna sell drugs.” Her mind was made up.

  We talked for hours about her biological sperm doner, Malcolm, who sold heroin, and her real daddy, Duane, who sold crack cocaine. I knew as a mother I was supposed to discourage her, but it was in her system. Krystal got it from her fathers. She was going to do it anyway, so I wanted her to have the knowledge and the heart for the game.

  CHAPTER SIX

  Ms. Lady gave me a lot of knowledge about the life I was about to enter. What she didn’t know was my daddy had already schooled me a lot. I remember on my eighth birthday while on our way to get my present, daddy picked up Uncle Nardo. He was not my real uncle, but he and Aunt Rose were the only family I had. Uncle Nardo was bleeding, and his eye was swollen.

  “I got jacked by some young dealer,” Uncle Nardo said.

  Daddy Duane was furious. “Was it one of Malcolm’s people?” he asked. I knew they were talking about my biological father. He didn’t mean anything to me but a gift on my birthday.

  I heard Daddy say, “We gonna take care of it.” I knew that meant trouble. My dad didn’t get mad or angry on the regular. However, when he did, you knew something was going to happen.

  They looked at each other, and nothing else was said. We rode in silence until we came to a stoplight, where some guys were on the corner.

  Uncle Nardo nudged my father. “There they are. They really got some balls still out hustling with my stuff. They must think I’m weak.”

  “Calm down. I got Krystal in the car, and I don’t want her to get hurt. I’ll let you out a block away. I’ll take the car around the block and park at the other end. That way, we can catch them in the middle.”

  He let Uncle Nardo out and went around the block. “Krystal, you stay in the car. I’ll be right outside. I promise I won’t go too far.”

  “Daddy, I’m not scared. Can I help you?” I proudly asked. I was always with my dad, so I watched him handle business. He also let me hold his little gun sometimes. We nicknamed it Tick Tock. He taught me that if anybody messes
with you, shoot first and ask questions later. Strangely, I always thought I was protecting him when I was holding Tick Tock.

  “No, Krystal. I’m good. I’ll talk to you when I get back. I always explain what I’m doing and why when I’m with you, don’t I?” he asked.

  “Yes, Daddy, just be careful. Where’s my Tick Tock?” I asked.

  “It’s in the glove compartment,” he responded.

  Daddy Duane got out of the car. He bent down, gun in hand, closing the door behind him. I reached in the glove compartment and got my Tick Tock. I slid down in the back seat so no one could see me. I held Tick Tock with both hands close to the side of my face. My two little fingers were on the trigger. I know this was unusual for an eight-year-old, but my dad was a man of sheer reality. He didn’t try to hide his life or any part of it from his family. He said he wanted us to be aware of what was going on. He always said it was better to know what to expect than to not expect it and get caught. Then it was too late.

  Uncle Nardo walked right up to the three men and started shooting. One man fell, and the other two took off running in the direction of where Daddy had parked. Uncle Nardo chased one man, and the other man came toward the car. Daddy stood up, and the man stopped, fear on his face with his hands in the air.

  “Did Malcolm send you?” I heard Daddy ask the guy. “Tell me the truth and I’ll let you live.”

  The man sounded really nervous when he answered. “N–naw, man. I owe him some money, and I’m tryin’ to get some to pay him back, but he ain’t sent me.”

  At that moment, Uncle Nardo came running up the street. I could hear sirens blazing in the background, and they were getting closer. “Come on, man. We got to go,” he yelled at Daddy, his adrenalin pumping.

  “Is this the guy that robbed you?” Daddy spoke up as he held the gun on the young man in front of him. “Nigga say Malcolm had nothing to do with it. So, you believe him, or what?”

  Uncle Nardo looked Daddy Duane straight in his eyes. I guess friends always know what their friends are going to do. “Yeah, dude, I believe him,” he laughed.